(no subject)

 . . .Maashii T^T
wae do you leave me like this T^T

y u no give the kanju work
they're the most prettiest and talented in all of J&A to me!

Ill just start . . .

 . . . With a big update post
So as you may know Ive stopped studying quite some time ago (December)
Im going to a psychologist every week once, and will go into therapy once they have a spot for me
At the moment I also work in a hotel als a cleaning lady
(It's a heavy job =.=)
This tuesday I had a tooth extracted and it hurts T^T 
Also I'm fangirling over more people now:
- Kanjani8
- Johnnys Jr.
- Kansai Johnnys Jr.

- Morning Musume
- Berryz Koubou
- C-ute

- Shinee
- Super Junior

- F(x)
As for now;
Im going to clean and organise this journal
And my twitter account if twitter works along
. . . 
After that I'll try to be more active again


Totally . . .

In 2011, sudden_wisdom resolves to...
Cut down to ten rainbows a day.
Go to the johnnys juniors every month.
Give some angelina1303s to charity.
Be nicer to miya_april.
Admit my true feelings to moon_kaka.
Backup my music regularly.
Get your own New Year's Resolutions:
In 2011, alterpiero resolves to...
Connect with my inner japan.
Give some news to charity.
Find a new veteran.
Become a better klaha.
Learn to play the lolita.
Pay for my teddybears on time.
Get your own New Year's Resolutions:

The kingdom of dreams

Far away and long ago there was a kingdom filled with people of some sort. None of them were the same, and none of them looked alike. There were arguments among these people, but also times of peace. Never did it last. Everyday the people were fighting over power. Who was to rule this kingdom?

One of the citizens was known as Mythe. He was brave and strong and always undertook adventures. He dared to challenge everything and was never afraid of anyone. He was a tall man with long golden hair and a big sword, by which he saved people in need whenever he could. But, sometimes his courage was outrages, and he would do reckless things. He endangered himself needlessly. When he ruled, the kingdom conquered a lot, but it lost even more.

Another one was Meek. She was an angel. On tall legs and long golden hair she stood on top of the towers watching over the kingdom. Her wings span broadly and secure, white with a line of golden feathers that shone in the sunlight. At night she shone over the scared citizens as being another moon. She was gentle and just. Only raising her long sword towards those who did bad things, but only to shock them, never to harm them. She was wise and calm. When Meek ruled, the kingdom was at peace, but because of her gentle nature, she never ruled for long.

Then there was Felicity. A joyfull young girl with a bright smile. Bouncingly she walked over the fields of grass in spring and sang while looking at the clouds. She never bothered to rule the kingdom, it wasn’t her concern. But every now and then, when all others subsided, she got on the throne. The only thing she cared about is the happiness of the moment. She seemed to have tons of energy, and never stopped. Some people suspected her to never even sleep. If she would rule, the kingdom may have been in bliss, but the citizens would soon be tired.

There was Silence. A mysterious man. Veiled in a black cloak he sat in the corner watching over the others as he said nothing. If you were to talk to him he seemed not to listen. He wouldn’t even look at you. Inside of him he was as empty as a dreamless sleep, and his eyes reflected his nature. But, calm he never was. If Silence were to rule the kingdom, it would fall apart very easily.

And there was Lament. She would sit in her house all day, hiding for the sunlight, afraid that it would see her sorrows. She barely ever talked to anyone, and if she did she acted strong and happy. But her heart felt the opposite. Guilty for all the trouble in the world, she would feel remorse. As if the ocean lay over her head, waiting to rain down on her, so was her luck. If Lament ruled the kingdom, those clouds came on to everyone. Yet, she was a very strong fighter and ruled long.

Lust was a demon. He had long black hair, and manipulative eyes. With those eyes he drew in the innocence of everyone around him. Partly out of jealousy, partly out of craving. He always wanted to be the only one for everyone and forced all citizens to obey him. At times were Lust ruled, there was slavery and war.

Fear was a woman, always scared of everything. If there was nothing to be afraid of, she would think something up to be afraid of. Often she was afraid of being, scared of herself. Fear was always one of the main rulers of the kingdom though. Not always obviously available, but with secretive influence.

There was Rage too. A young man with a very aggressive nature. He was powerful and tall and people feared him. He became angry at everything and everyone around him walked on eggshells. Yet, they never knew the full impact of his anger, for often he wouldn’t express it towards others. When Rage ruled, the kingdom was in trouble often. Anyone who made any mistake, no matter how small, would end up in jail.

Another citizen was Solid. She had the mind of a monk, the will of a fighter and the strength of a samurai. Nothing could harm her. She was cold and bitter towards others, but not unjust in her actions. She stood tall with pride, with no need for weapons. She was respected by those who knew her, and feared by those who didn’t. When Solid ruled, the kingdom was in secure hands. However, there was no place for joy or fun.

Lone was there too. He was never noticed by anyone though, and always easily forgotten. No matter where he was, no one seemed to notice him. Even if he screamed or cried, the other citizens would pass him by. Lone was always alone. The only person he knew was Fear. Together they had a constant influence on the kingdom.

The last citizen of the kingdom was Fantasy. She was always dressed in bright extraordinary clothes, dreamed of things no one knew of and tell stories to whoever wanted to listen. They never made much sense, and were barely ever realistic. Fantasy was liked by almost everyone, and therefore often became the ruler. But under her rule, everyone would forget to do important things.


Right now I'm actually dealing with psychlogical stuff. Therefore I'm not so busy with updating my LJ and such.
Next week my therapist will give me a complete diagnose, but she already said it may be a borderline personality disorder, an avoidance personality disorder or a combination between them . . .

(no subject)

Forever be with me